It can be hard for you to open up and tell your partner about how you feel. They just don’t seem to get it. You’re the way you are for a reason. You had to learn to protect yourself from rejection and shame- a shame that is so paralyzing that you will do just about anything to distract yourself from it. You’ve convinced yourself that it’s best if people don’t know too much about you, because if they did, they wouldn’t accept you. Your strategy has worked well for you, or at least well enough until now.
Your dating relationships are always so disappointing. It seems like you’re stuck in a cycle of dating the same person over and over again. When the relationship ends, you’re right back where you started- lonely, sad, and frustrated because it seems that you’ll be alone forever.
It has been more than a year since your loved one died, and the pain of your loss still feels just as raw as it did when you first found out. You feel rejected, angry, and confused by what happened, while feelings of bitterness and resentment are starting to emerge when you find yourself thinking about your loss. It may be hard for you to find meaning or purpose for your life, or to accept your loss. You may also dealing with shame about how your loved one died, and the people you thought you could depend on to see you through a tough time, are either avoiding you, or ignoring your loss because they’re too uncomfortable to bring it up. Your sadness runs deep, and it’s hard to imagine how life will ever be worth living again.
You’re going through a period of transition. Maybe you’re ending a marriage, retiring from a new job, or maybe your children have left and you’re facing being alone with your spouse or partner for the first time in years. Not so long ago you were certain in your identity, your role, your purpose- but now, it’s not clear at all. There’s a sadness that you’re feeling that you can’t quite name, but you’re pretty sure that it’s related to the changes in your life.
No matter what has prompted you to seek therapy at this time, we can work together to understand where you are, identify where you want to be, and figure out to remove the obstacles that stand between the two. Along the way we’ll take a look at your past and how it is influencing your present, and explore feelings that you might not even be aware that you have. We’ll work to make sense of it all- the long-forgotten hurts, the wishes and fantasies, and the relationships, that all contribute to your present suffering. You’ll develop insight into what’s stopping you from getting to where you’d like to be, and experience the freedom to make different choices about your future.
Let’s get started.